Boundaries for Healers and their Families

Boundaries for Healers? How dare you have boundaries?!?

(Yes, folks, I actually sent this letter below to my family! They had never even considered that people do better with boundaries, let alone boundaries for healers like me! And of course, my mom belittled and ridiculed me for doing this. Still, it needed doing! I’m posting it here in case it’s useful to other healers.)

My Policy on “Doing” Healing for Family Members

Dear Family (kids, spouse, parents, siblings, nephews/nieces, cousins, in-laws etc)

The reason for writing down my policy is two-fold. First, it gives me an effective, efficient, clear structure for how to do healing work with you, while relieving my sense of overwhelm that I should be helping my family 24/7 and my guilt about not helping 24/7. Second, it clarifies for you how to actually get help from me.

1. I will do healing sessions for you, without your permission or request, if you have an emergency or serious acute situation.

2. I will not do healing sessions for you, for a chronic long-term condition, minor injury, other non-emergency situations like cold, flu, heachache, pain, depression, relationship problem, stress, etc… unless you specifically request that I do so.

3. If you want me to do a healing session with you, you must ask me. I will not offer, unless it’s an emergency or you are not physically capable of asking. When you are a willing participant who takes responsibility for your own healing, I am more than willing to work with you. I am honored to help.

4. Healing is not something that I do to you. The healer “doing healing to” a healee, can work very well in the initial phase of their relationship, or for a young child, or in an emergency. But after that initial phase is over, or the child becomes self-aware and self-competent, healing work for non-emergency conditions must be mutually agreed upon. And more importantly, you must take responsibility for your own on-going healing. I can open doorways to Wholeness for you, but I cannot be constantly pushing you through them!

5. Please expand your expectations of the possible result of the healing session to include a) infinite limitless instant healing; b) no discernible change; and c) anything in between. Your non-attachment to the outcome of the healing paradoxically gives you a better chance at good results – as does your willingness to allow change in your information-field.

6. The kind of healing work that I do is not “curing”. Your medical diagnosis, the conventional explanation, and the so-called common-sense cause of your condition is just a tiny fraction of your issue, from an energy/information standpoint. If you ask me to work with you, be prepared to work on your whole life in all dimensions – not just on your local complaint. The goal of any “healing” that I do is Alignment with Wholeness. When alignment is achieved, healing can happen quickly, because…

7. Healing is a Side-Effect of Wholeness.

Looking forward to healing with you!

Love and Wholeness,

Elma